The dream we haven't dared to dream

Dan Pallotta @?TED 2016

When I think about dreams, like many of you, I think about this picture. I was eight when I watched Neil Armstrong step off the Lunar Module onto the surface of the Moon. I had never seen anything like it before, and I've never seen anything like it since.

We got to the Moon for one simple reason: John Kennedy committed us to a deadline.And in the absence of that deadline, we would still be dreaming about it.Leonard Bernstein said two things are necessary for great achievement: a plan and not quite enough time.

Deadlines and commitments are the great and fading lessons of Apollo. And they are what give the word "moonshot" its meaning. And our world is in desperate need of political leaders willing to set bold deadlines for the achievement of daring dreams on the scale of Apollo again.

When I think about dreams, I think about the drag queens of LA and Stonewall and millions of other people risking everything to come out when that was really dangerous, and of this picture of the White House lit up in rainbow colors, yes--

celebrating?America's gay and lesbian citizens' right to marry. It is a picture that in my wildest dreams I could never have imagined when I was 18 and figuring out that I was gay and feeling estranged from my country and my dreams because of it.

I think about this picture of my family that I never dreamed I could ever have --

and of our children holding this headline I never dreamed could ever be printed about the Supreme Court ruling.

We need more of the courage of drag queens and astronauts.

But I want to talk about the need for us to dream in more than one dimension,because there was something about Apollo that I didn't know when I was 8, and something about organizing that the rainbow colors over. Of the 30 astronauts in the original Mercury, Gemini and Apollo programs, only seven marriages survived. Those iconic images of the astronauts bouncing on the Moon obscure the alcoholism and depression on Earth.

Thomas Merton, the Trappist monk, asked during the time of Apollo, "What can we gain by sailing to the moon if we are not able to cross the abyss that separates us from ourselves?" And what can we gain by the right to marry if we are not able to cross the acrimony and emotional distance that so often separates us from our love? And not just in marriage. I have seen the most hurtful, destructive, tragic infighting in LGBT and AIDS and breast cancer and non-profit activism, all in the name of love.

Thomas Merton also wrote about wars among saints and that "there is a pervasive form of contemporary violence to which the idealist most easily succumbs:activism and overwork. The frenzy of our activism neutralizes our work for peace. It destroys our own inner capacity for peace." Too often our dreams become these compartmentalized fixations on some future that destroy our ability to be present for our lives right now. Our dreams of a better life for some future humanity or some other humanity in another country alienate us from the beautiful human beings sitting next to us at this very moment.

Well,that's just the price of progress, we say. You can go to the Moon or you can have stability in your family life. And we can't conceive of dreaming in both dimensions at the same time. And we don't set the bar much higher than stability when it comes to our emotional life. Which is why our technology for talking to one another has gone vertical, our ability to listen and understand one another has gone nowhere. Our access to information is through the roof,our access to joy, grounded. But this idea, that our present and our future are mutually exclusive, that to fulfill our potential for doing we have to surrender our profound potential for being, that the number of transistors on a circuit can be doubled and doubled, but our capacity for compassion and humanity and serenity and love is somehow limited is a false and suffocating choice.

Now,I'm not suggesting simply the uninspiring idea of more work-life balance. What good is it for me to spend more time with my kids at home if my mind is always somewhere else while I'm doing it? I'm not even talking about mindfulness.Mindfulness is all of a sudden becoming a tool for improving productivity.

Right?

I'm talking about dreaming as boldly in the dimension of our being as we do about?industry and technology. I'm talking about an audacious authenticity that allows us to cry with one another, a heroic humility that allows us to remove our masks and be real. It is our inability to be with one another, our fear of crying with one another, that gives rise to so many of the problems we are frantically trying to solve in the first place, from Congressional gridlock to economic inhumanity.

I'm talking about what Jonas Salk called an Epoch B, a new epoch in which we become as excited about and curious about and scientific about the development of our humanity as we are about the development of our technology.

We should not shrink from this opportunity simply because we don't really understand it. There was a time when we didn't understand space. Or because we're more used to technology and activism. That is the very definition of being stuck in a comfort zone. We are now very comfortable imagining unimaginable technological achievement. In 2016, it is the dimension of our being itself that cries out for its fair share of our imagination.

Now,we're all here to dream, but maybe if we're honest about it, each of us chasing our own dream. You know, looking at the name tags to see who can help me with my dream, sometimes looking right through one another's humanity. I can't be bothered with you right now. I have an idea for saving the world. Right?

Years ago, once upon a time, I had this beautiful company that created these long journeys for heroic civic engagement. And we had this mantra: "Human.Kind. Be Both." And we encouraged people to experiment outrageously with kindness. Like, "Go help everybody set up their tents." And there were a lot of tents.

"Go buy everybody?popsicles." "Go help people fix their flat tires even though you know the dinner line is going to get longer."

And people really took us up on this, so much so that if you got a flat tire on the AIDS ride, you had trouble fixing it, because there were so many people there asking you if you needed help.

For a few days, for tens of thousands of people, we created these worlds that everybody said were the way they wish the world could always be. What if we experimented with creating that kind of world these next few days? And instead of going up to someone and asking them, "What do you do?" ask them,"So what are your dreams?" or "What are your broken dreams?" You know, "TED." Tend to Each other's Dreams.

Maybe it's "I want to stay sober" or "I want to build a tree house with my kid." You know, instead of going up to the person everybody wants to meet, go up to the person who is all alone and ask them if they want to grab a cup of coffee.

I think what we fear most is that we will be denied the opportunity to fulfill our true potential, that we are born to dream and we might die without ever having the chance.

Imagine living in a world where we simply recognize that deep, existential fear in one another and love one another boldly because we know that to be human is to live with that fear. It's time for us to dream in multiple dimensions simultaneously, and somewhere that transcends all of the wondrous things we can and will and must do lies the domain of all the unbelievable things we could be.

It's time we set foot into that dimension and came out about the fact that we have dreams there, too. If the Moon could dream, I think that would be its dream for us. It's an honor to be with you.

Thank you very much.

當我想到夢想與很多人一樣，我會想到這張圖片。八歲時我看見尼爾·阿姆斯特朗從登月艙中走出踏上月球表面。前無古人后亦無來者。

我們登月的原因很簡單：肯尼迪總統(tǒng)向大家承諾了死限。如果沒有這個死限，也許這件事還只是一個夢想。倫納德·伯恩斯坦說過偉大的成就有兩個必要條件一個計劃和不太夠的時間。

死限和承諾是阿波羅計劃留給我們深刻卻漸漸淡化的一堂課。是他們定義了什么叫“射月思維”?，F(xiàn)在世界上急需偉大的政治領(lǐng)導設(shè)立像阿波羅那樣大膽的有死限的計劃來再次地成就偉大的夢想。

當我想到夢想，我會想到洛杉磯和斯通沃爾的異裝女皇，和那些數(shù)以百萬,不顧一切危險勇敢站出來的人們。也會想到最終美國白宮也裝扮上了彩虹色。是的

這是為了慶祝美國同性戀公民有權(quán)利結(jié)婚。我從沒想過有一天，我夢寐以求的夢想可以實現(xiàn)。當時我18歲，發(fā)現(xiàn)自己是一個男同性戀，感覺被自己的國家遺棄，同時也因此感覺自己離夢想越來越遠。

我從沒想過我可以有這樣一張夢想裡的家庭照。

我們的孩子可以拿著這樣的報紙頭條，我從沒想過最高法院會立法支持我們。

我們需要更多異裝皇后和宇航員那樣的勇氣。

但是我想以不同的角度，討論我們需要夢想的必要性。因為八歲時我并不知曉阿波羅計劃的事情，也不知道彩虹色標志背后的艱辛。30位“水星”“雙子星”和“阿波羅”先遣計劃的宇航員中只有七位的婚姻僥幸存活。那些在月球表面彈跳的標誌性畫面掩蓋了他們在地球上的酗酒和抑郁。

托馬斯·默頓一位特拉比斯特派的僧人在阿波羅計劃期間題問過，“如果我們都不能夠填平人與人之間的巨大隔閡我們通過登月又能獲得什么呢？”如果我們無法跨越言語的刻薄和情感的距離即使有了結(jié)婚的權(quán)利我們得到的是甚么？不僅僅是婚姻方面。我曾經(jīng)見過最傷人的最破壞性的，最慘烈的內(nèi)訌發(fā)生在同性戀與艾滋病患者之間，發(fā)生在乳癌患者和非盈利組織之中，而這些內(nèi)訌都被冠以愛的名義。

托馬斯·默頓在關(guān)于先哲的戰(zhàn)爭中也寫到“當今讓理想主義者最容易屈服的當代暴力有一種普遍的現(xiàn)象：行動主義和過度疲勞。行動主義的狂熱抵消了我們?yōu)榇龠M和平所付出的努力并破壞了我們內(nèi)心對和平的嚮往。”我們的夢想往往會變得無疾而終，讓我們失去了活在當下的能力。我們的夢想都是關(guān)于人類未來更好的生活關(guān)于其他國家人民更好的生活。卻反而讓我們疏遠了此時此刻坐在我們身邊的美好人們。

好吧，我們說這就是進步的代價。你可以去月球或者也可以僅僅維持家庭的穩(wěn)定。在同一時間，魚與熊掌不可兼得。而且說到感情生活的時候我們也不敢奢望太多，簡單穩(wěn)定即可。所以幫助我們與他人交流的科技一直呈指數(shù)式增長但是我們傾聽和理解別人的能力卻沒有變化。我們獲得了很多很多知識卻沒有獲得一點點快樂。一般認爲，我們的現(xiàn)在和未來不可兼得，如果要實現(xiàn)我們的潛力就要放棄當下，電路版上的晶體管數(shù)可以翻倍再翻倍，但是我們的同情心人性、平常心和愛卻是有限的，這些觀點是錯誤的，是自掘墳墓的選擇。

我不是在陳詞濫調(diào)地建議保持工作生活平衡。如果心不在焉，那花更多的時間，待在家陪孩子也沒有意義。我現(xiàn)在也不是在講專注。專注突然就變成了提高效率的工具。

是吧？

我現(xiàn)在講的是夢想，一種活在當下，在工作和科技中進步的夢想。我在討論一種無畏的真情讓我們可以為彼此流淚，我在討論一種偉大的謙遜讓我們摘下面具，真誠相待。正是因為我們?nèi)狈ハ鄿贤ǖ哪芰σ驗槲覀冇捎诤ε虏桓一ハ嗫拊V才會出現(xiàn)很多諸如國會僵局，經(jīng)濟不人道等我們一直在瘋狂解決的問題。

我在說喬納斯·索爾克所謂的B時代在這個時代的我們無論是對于科技的進步還是對于人性的發(fā)展都無比的激動，無比的好奇，無比的理性。

我們不能因為不了解就放棄這樣的機會。以前我們也不了解太空，但不能因為我們對于所知的科技和行動主義比加熟悉就要放棄了解太空。這無疑是畫地為牢。我們現(xiàn)在很舒服地幻想不可思議的科技進步。在2016年，我們急需我們的人性在我們的夢想之中占據(jù)一席之地。

各位今天來這裡都是要追逐夢想的，如果我們彼此真誠以待我們都可以追逐自己的夢想。當我們環(huán)顧周圍人的名牌，看看有誰可以幫我完成夢想的時候，我們有時候會忽略了名牌背后的那個靈魂，抱歉，我現(xiàn)在不想被打擾，我正在思考如何拯救世界。對吧？

幾年前，我曾經(jīng)設(shè)立了這樣一個美好的公司，我們讓英勇的公民參與到這趟長程的旅途當中。我們的座右銘是：“與人為善于己為善“我們鼓勵大家積極行善，比如“幫助大家支起他們的帳篷”然后很多帳篷就支起來了。

“給大家買冰棍。”“幫助需要的人補胎哪怕要花更多時間排隊等晚飯。“

人們真的開始這樣積極地幫忙以至于如果你在為艾滋病騎行的過程中爆胎了你很難去修好它，因為太多的人在詢問你是否需要幫忙。

幾天中，我們?yōu)樯先f人創(chuàng)造了這樣的世界所有人都希望這樣的世界可否一直這樣美好下去。如果我們可以在接下來的日子一直創(chuàng)造這樣的世界，我們會得到什么結(jié)果呢？與其找到別人問他：“你是做什么的？”不如問他們：“你有什么夢想？”或者：“你未能實現(xiàn)的夢想是什么？” “TED”就是關(guān)心每一個人的夢想。

也許夢想就是“我想要戒酒”或者“我想和我的孩子建造一個樹屋”。與其去趨炎附勢，不如雪中送炭，問問那些孤獨的人是否需要一杯咖啡。

我想我們最害怕的是，我們自己放棄了我們與生俱來可以真正實現(xiàn)我們潛力的夢想，害怕我們至死都不曾一試。

想像一下在一個世界中，盡管我們意識到了那深深存在的恐懼，我們?nèi)匀挥赂业厣類壑舜艘驗槲覀冎酪玫饺松恼嬷B，必須學會與這種恐懼共存。是時候讓我們同時從不同的方向一起夢想，在我們盡我們所能不停地追尋并實現(xiàn)我們遠大的夢想之后，我們會得到人生的真諦。

是時候讓我們朝新的方向探索并開始實現(xiàn)我們的夢想了。如果月亮能夢想我想它的夢想會跟我們一樣。與各位相聚是一種榮幸。

非常感謝